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Jun 4, 2005
First-year students at Med School were receiving their first anatomy class with a real dead human body.
They all gathered around the surgery table with the body covered with a white sheet.
The professor started the class by telling them, "In medicine, it is necessary to have two important qualities as a doctor:
The first is that you not be disgusted by anything involving the human body."
For an example, the Professor pulled back the sheet, stuck his finger in the butt of the corpse, withdrew it and stuck it in his mouth.
"Go ahead and do the same thing, "he told his students.
The students freaked out, hesitated for several minutes, but eventually took turns sticking a finger in the butt of the dead body and sucking on it.
When everyone finished, the Professor looked at them and told them, "The second most important quality is observation.
I stuck in my middle finger and sucked on my index finger.
Now learn to pay attention." ©
Posted at 08:53 pm by camille007
Permalink
Apr 30, 2005
Lets talk about sex baby....
1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth.
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2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow.
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3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.
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4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!
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5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.
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6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!
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7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.
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8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.
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9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.
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10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and high fever.
so to all guys and gals who enjoys having sex as much as they do..dont worry..its perfectly safe!!
hahahaha!!!
goodluck! ®
Posted at 01:01 pm by camille007
Permalink
Apr 5, 2005
Drivers Education Exam Answers
The following are a sampling of REAL answers received on exams given by the California Department of Transportation's driving school (read Saturday Traffic School for moving violation offenders.)
Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? A: What for? He can't see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pick-up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, “Guns don't kill people. I do.”
Q: What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car? A: Always wear a condom.
Q: When driving through fog, what should you use? A: Your car.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident? A: Be too sh*t-faced to find your keys.
Q: What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving. A: I'd probably lose my buzz a lot faster.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully? A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: What are some points to remember when passing or being passed? A: Make eye contact and wave “hello” if he/she is cute.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light? A: The color.
Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic? A: Heavy psychedelics.
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem? A: Carry loaded weapons.
Posted at 05:16 pm by camille007
Permalink
Apr 4, 2005
A waiter from the famed Ritz Hotel in Boston was called to the room of actress Ruth Gordon, who wanted a late-night snack. He found her propped up against the pillows in her bed, finishing a call from Hollywood.
While serving the snack, the waiter told Ms. Gordon that he had to give a speech at an employees' meeting, and he hoped to end it with a big laugh. She graciously invited him to recite the speech to her.
The next day, the famous actress asked the waiter if he had got his closing laugh. "No", he answered. "I got the laugh at the beginning, when I started off: 'As I was saying to Ruth Gordon in bed last night....'"
®
Posted at 09:47 am by camille007
Permalink
Mar 18, 2005
TIPS ON HOW TO REMEMBER SOMEONE'S NAME...
1. Establish direct eye contact and smile during the introduction.
2. Give your full attention to the introduction.
3. Think of someone with the same name.
4. Form an association immediately with the name and her outstanding feature or anything else that will assist you to recall all or part of the name. The first association- complimentary or insulting is the best.
5. Use the name frequently during the conversation.
6. If you have forgotten the name or didn't hear it the first time, ask the person to tell you again or even spell her name.
SO SA MGA ULYANIN DYAN...YAN PO ANG MGA TIPS PARA D MO MAKALIMUTAN ANG PANGALAN NG BAGO MONG KAKILALA... GOODLUCK!!! ©
Posted at 08:23 pm by camille007
Permalink
Mar 16, 2005
WHAT MAKES A GOOD BOYFRIEND
»Your boyfriend's biceps must be bigger than his ear lobes.
»Your boyfriend must be able to remember both your first and your last name within ten minutes of watching "PBA".
»Your boyfriends vocabulary must include at least 20% intelligible words mixed in with the typical blend of glunts,snorts,and belches.
»Your boyfriend should be able to defend you against at least two goons.
»Your boyfriend must be able to name more great events in the Philippine history other than Ginebra's grand slams in the PBA.
»Your boyfriend must reserve at least 15 minutes a day for conversation that does not include sports, cars, super models, or science fiction movies.
»Your boyfriend must know the difference right and wrong.. You're right and he's wrong!
»Your boyfriend must be able to detect important shifts in your emotional needs every month (PMS).
»Your boyfriends ideas of a date must include the possiblity of him spending money.
»Your boyfriend must be able to dance at least one dance other that "Shalala.."
Posted at 10:47 pm by camille007
Permalink
1. Call.
2. Dont lie.
3. The correct answer to "Do I look fat?" is never "Yes!"
4. Same thing with "Is she prettier than I am?"
5. Ordering for her is good. Telling her what she wants is bad.
6. Being attentive is good. Stalking is bad.
7. Talking is good. Shouting is bad. Slapping is a crime.
8. A grunt is seldom an acceptable answer to any question.
9. None of your ex-girlfriends was never nicer, prettier, or better.
10. Her cooking is excellent.
11. Answering "Wala yon!" to the questions, "Sinong kausap mo sa phone?" or "Sinong katext mo?" is never to end that conversation.
12. Burping is never sexy.
13. You're wrong.
14. Admitting you're sorry.
15. No means no. Yes means yes. Silence could mean anything she feels like at that particular moment in time,and it could change withour prior notice.
16. Never let her walk anywhere alone after 11 PM.
17. If you want to break-up with her, then do and say so.Dont act like a complete jerk until she does it for you.
18. Don't tell her you love her if you don't.
19.Tell her you love her of you do, and make it very often.
20. Remember Valentine's Day, Anniversaries, Birthdays and the like.
21. Dont try to change the way she dresses.
22. Her haircut is never ugly or bad.
23. Dont let your friends pick on her.
24. Always compliment the good thing she does.
25. Never make her cry.
Posted at 04:11 pm by camille007
Permalink
20 REASONS WHY CHOCOLATE IS BETTER THAN SEX
1. You can GET chocolate.
2. Chocolate satisfies even when it has gone soft.
3. "If you love me, you'll swallow that" has real meaning with chocolate.
4. You can safely have chocolate when you are driving.
5. You can make chocolate last as long as you want.
6. You can have chocolate infront of your mother.
7. If you bit the nuts too hard, the chocolate won't mind.
8. Two people of the same sex can have chocolate together without any disapproval.
9. The word "commitment" doesn't scare chocolate off.
10. You can have chocolate on your desk during work hours without upsetting your workmates.
11. You can ask a stranger for chocolate without getting your face slapped.
12. You don't get hairs from chocolate.
13. With chocolate, there is no need to fake it.
14. Chocolate doesn't produce little chocolates nine months later.
15. You can have chocolate at any time of the month.
16. Good chocolate is easy to find.
17. One chocolate doesn't get jealous if it sees you having another chocolate.
18. You are never too young or too old for chocolate.
19. When you have chocolate, it doesn't keep the neighbor's awake.
20. With chocolate, size doesn't matter, it's always good.
So what would you rather have? A big bar of chocolate or sex???
Posted at 03:56 pm by camille007
Permalink
Mar 3, 2005
THE GIFTS OF A VERY BEST FRIEND...
A lifetime of love
in a hug and a smile,
A reason to visit
and to stay for a while
The strength of a bond
that's destined to last,
The joys of the present,
The warmth of the past...
These are the treasures
a fortunate few..
Are lucky to cherish
all their lives through.
These are the blessings
on which we depend,
For these are the gifts
of a very best friend...
Posted at 10:18 am by camille007
Permalink
Frienship is a blessing
it's the best that you have to share,
The talents and the wisdom,
the capacity to care...
It's being there to lend support,
whatever needs arise,
It's making sure that others know
they're special in your eyes...
Friendship is a blessing,
and, to all who have a friend,
It's one of the most precious gifts
that life could ever send.
I WILL ALWAYS FEEL SO VERY BLESSED TO HAVE A WONDERFUL FRIEND LIKE YOU!!©
Posted at 10:10 am by camille007
Permalink
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 SELENE: You are selene! Beautiful, vivacious, fierce and seductive, Selene vowed she would destroy Lycans after her family was murdered by the werewolves. So ruthless is she that selene is a member of the Death Dealers. This elite Vampire warrior class's mission is to make the Lycans extinct. Ever wish you could be a vampire?
Which UNDERWORLD character are you? brought to you by Quizilla Barbie Got Back! Go you! You're the closest thing ever to a true black Barbie. Shake that fat ass of yours.
If You Were A Barbie, Which Messed Up Version Would You Be? brought to you by Quizilla
| Camille may explode without warning | M
EXPLOSIVE |
From Go-Quiz.comI am 64% evil.
I'm getting there. I haven't done all the damage I could do but I've done quite a bit. I'm just over the border into the Evil Zone.
Are you evil? find out at Hilowitz.com
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